Happy Father's Day

We just got back from a walk and decided to pick up the mail. Lo and behold, there was an envelope from our attorney...

IT'S OFFICIAL!!!

The Honorable Diana Stuart signed the General Judgment of Adoption on June 11, 2008. What an appropriate day to receive the news. Happy Father's Day!

Home Visit #2

Our second and final post-placement home visit was yesterday. It was somewhat ironic that I had to take a half day off from work on my second day back. But since I came in for a half day meeting last week, I'm calling it even. Anyway, the home visit was again brief and painless. There is certainly less anxiety when you already have the baby. The pre-adoption meetings feel a little more like interviews. Like if the counselor doesn't like you then there will be no baby. I know that's not true but it doesn't stop me from worrying a bit. But with the post-placement visits, I pick up a little but there is not nearly as much cleaning involved. The level of cleanliness is my anxiety gauge I guess.

The second visit is done at 2 months and preferably after the 2-month doctor appointment so that they can get the latest height and weight info. The counselor asks about any medical problems, daily routines and bonding. I guess they want to make sure that the baby is developing normally and that we are all feeling like a family. Like I said, these are pretty easy questions folks. Ian was having a particularly good nap so he managed to sleep through the entire visit. After a half hour, the final post-placement home visit unceremoniously concluded with a "thanks" and "good luck." It's so funny how much anticipation and excitement accompany the process before the placement. Then once the baby arrives, the process doesn't seem as important. In our hearts, Ian is already completely and forever ours. Alas we have a couple more months before the legal system agrees with us.

At this point the counselor will type up the visit notes and send them to our attorney for filing. This is the last step before a judge can finalize the adoption. Of course, that will still take a few months. With Lillian, it took 6 months before the adoption was finalized but we are using a different attorney with Ian's adoption and he thinks it will only take 3-4 months this time. So we're at least halfway there! Again, the finalization is rather unceremonious. One day we'll open the mailbox to find the signed adoption paperwork and birth certificate. And with that one envelope, we will be legally Ian's parents for life.

2 Week Visit

We had our 2 week follow up visit with the counselor last week. The whole thing took about 15 minutes and involved questions such as:

• Ian's height/weight at birth and now
• Any health issues
• How are we bonding with Ian
• How is the relationship with his birthfamily

Pretty painless really. We have another visit scheduled at the 2 month mark. In the meanwhile our attorney has filed the paperwork. The adoption should be finalized in about 3 months. Yeah!!!

Ashley and her dad are coming up this weekend for their first visit since Ian arrived. We are so excited to see them again! Ian is growing like a weed and I'm sure they will be amazed at how much he's changed in just 3 weeks.

Ian's New Blog

It's time for Ian to have his own blog. Yes this blog is about him but only part of him. And I'll continue to update this blog as further adoption details occur. (Those will be infrequent at this point.) But, check out the full details of Ian's ever-developing story on www.ianzharris.blogspot.com. Don't go to ianharris...you'll need the z. That is unless you want to learn about how to build an online empire!

Thank you for all your prayers. As one of Ashley's friends described it, God really orchestrates a masterful plan. Ashley and her friends were praying for clear direction and strength. We were praying for a new baby and for the birthfamily. While we were blindly praying, God was faithfully bringing us together. All we had to do was trust Him.

Ian the Impersonator

As I was snapping pics of Ian today, I noticed that he seems to be a natural actor. Just look at him impersonating some famous people:

Uncle Sam

Rocky

Arsenio Hall

What a talent!

He's Here!

Ashley's birthing coach and friend called us around 9pm on the 16th and said that Ashley was feeling some contractions. They were going to wait for her clothes to dry and then make their way to the hospital. We jumped in the car and started driving. At 10:30pm she called to say they were at the hospital and Ashley was dialated to 8cm!!! At 12:30am when we were just 18 miles from the hospital, Ashley called to congratulate us on our new baby boy. We missed the birth! But we had a healthy beautiful baby boy. He was born at 11:52pm on the 16th. Lillian's birthday was the 16th of October so we were so pleased to hear that they share a birthdate. He was 8lbs 13oz and 21 inches long with blue eyes and short blondish brown hair. We arrived around 1:10am to greet our son.

After much debate, our little boy is named Ian Zachary Harris. Zachary was a name that Ashley had selected. Ian was chosen for several reasons. 1) It is a version of John (according to the name books) which is Jeff's middle name, his Dad's middle name and his Grandfather's name. 2) The "I" initial is in honor of my grandma Irene who passed away when I was a little girl. 3) It means "God is gracious" and we praise God's grace in this adoption. 4) I-A-N are the last 3 letters in Lillian's name. He is Lillian's little brother even by name.

After 3 days in the hospital, Ashley signed the necessary paperwork and we celebrated our new family with a special entrustment ceremony. Then we all headed to a house at Sunriver to spend some more time getting to know each other and doting on our little boy. We also hosted a birthday party for Ian with Ashley's friends and family in attendance. It was a wonderful week with love just pouring over Ian.

And now, we're home! It feels so good. Our little champ slept the entire way home even skipping a meal in the process. (Of course he demanded that meal as soon as the car stopped.) Thank you all for your prayers. We can't wait for all of you to meet him! In the meanwhile, this well photographed young man has tons of photos (we're averaging 60 photos a day so far...) at: http://www2.snapfish.com/thumbnailshare/AlbumID=211631746/a=105385130_105385130/t_=105385130

The Nursery

In 1 frenetic week I managed to convert the nursery from pink to blue. Thankfully the walls were green so we didn't have to repaint. Just about everything else was girly from the mirror to the bedding to the lamp. After many shopping trips, each item was replaced by boyish blue.

Lillian had moved out of the crib into a twin bed so we have both in the room right now. The biggest challenge was finding bedding for both beds that I liked and that coordinated...or at least didn't clash. I prefer not to use a theme and finding twin bedding that is not covered in cars or animals proved to be quite a task. Not to mention squeezing all that furniture into one room. But I have a feeling that twin bed is gonna come in handy on some particularly rough nights.

It still needs a couple more final touches and the curtains need ironing desperately but for the most part it's done. Now all we need is the little boy who is gonna use it.

Mediation II

It was another busy weekend. We left Thursday afternoon and took the long way in order to pick up traction tires in The Dalles. (Apparently my new car has special tires that are not readily available.) Friday we met Ashley, her aunt Becky and her friend/birthing coach Julie at the doctor's office. We were quite a crowd so Jeff eagerly volunteered to sit this one out in the waiting room. I met the midwife and heard this little boy's strong heartbeat. Everything is looking great. After the doctor's appointment, Ashley and her aunt meet with the counselor alone for a bit while we wondered the local mall. Then we gathered for the second and final mediation session. One by one we checked off all the components of the session from the birthplan to the name to the open adoption contract.

One thing they warn you about when you are adopting for the second time is not to expect the experience to be the same. Although we have tried to isolate this adoption and enjoy it as an independent journey, it is difficult not to compare. The hospital experience will be very different which I had a hard time accepting. But I have realized that it is only a few days of a lifetime so I can tough it out.

We really believe in the value of open adoption. We feel that it is best for the child to have lots of contact with his birthparents. Fortunately Ashley wants lots of contact which we're very excited about. The challenge will be maintaining that level of contact throughout our every changing, busy lives. We are writing the contract with the hope and commitment to making it happen.

We're continuing to build this relationship so that we have a foundation to build off of once this baby is born. Ashley and Julie are driving up to Portland this weekend to visit and see our house. That means Jeff is finishing all the final touches of the remodel and I am quickly converting the pink nursery to blue. I know the nursery doesn't need to be done this week but I want to get it ready for 3 reasons. 1) I want Ashley to see the room this little guy will sleep in so she can picture it when they're apart. 2) I want this baby to have a special space when he gets home that was created just for him. 3) I don't want to worry about decorating after he is born, I just want to enjoy him! I'll post pics once it's done.

I can't believe this baby could be here in the next few weeks. I am so ready to snuggle with him!!! Until then, please pray that the birthfather would sign the release papers. And pray that Ashley would feel confident in her decision despite many influencers telling her to parent.